When young Ladies have Children
What to Expect When Living with a Young Woman with Children
Whether you are rich or poor, you must understand that when you date
someone with children and then plan to move everyone in together,
it will not be as easy as you think especially if she is an over-the-top
parent, the kind who puts her children above herself and everyone
else!
Some things you might want to consider before inviting her to live
with you.
1. She will expect you to participate in meal preparation and other
household duties.
Living together requires all parties to participate in cleaning, cooking
and organizing-- sometimes on a daily basis. So those days of going
into the kitchen and serving yourself only may not work when there
are hungry little ones hoping you will fix them a bite to eat.
If you aren´t the type that likes to keep your place tidy and
she does, it will begin to wear on your nerves every time she feels
the need to move your things. You might become angered over children
touching your stuff or rearranging the household if you are not use
to them.
2. She might ask for money and assistance with her personal tasks.
It happens, she bought too much for the children and household, leaving
her with little money to tend to her needs. A supportive partner will
assist her with additional funds while helping her keep track of spending.
3. She plans to include you in on child-rearing, education, extracurricular
ivities, and anything else connected to daycare/school/college.
If the father was doing his part, you wouldn´t have to be too
concerned. But sometimes the father isn’t around, may not provide
like he should, or will punish her for getting involved with another
man. Best be prepared in case you are called upon to help with children.
4. Holiday celebrations will come and go, but somehow you will be
connected to them.
You may not celebrate, but then again maybe you do, help her with
the planning and ask her what might she need. If you don’t participate
in holiday gift-giving, then it would be helpful to let her know that
before moving in with her. She wouldn´t want to disappoint her
children, because her new boyfriend doesn´t like holidays.
5. There may be a father or two who might be active in his children´s
lives, so be prepared to meet her exe(s) one day.
If the father is involved, keep in mind that no matter what you like
or don´t like about the man, your allegiance is to your partner.
So don´t assume because he is friendly that you can talk to
him about his ex-wife or girlfriend. Also, never get so comfortable
with him that you think he doesn’t still care for the mother of his
children. Be respectful and maintain self-control. Stay away from
flippant remarks and hand gestures even if he
isn´t acting polite.
6. Whatever you do good, bad or otherwise will affect the entire household
and possibly the children´s father´s lifestyle as well.
If you move the family out-of-state, there may be some legal issues
that she might be presented with as a result. If you should cheat,
lie, steal, or do any other immoral thing, it may cost you your freedom;
therefore affecting the household income while creating unnecessary
tension for everyone.
7. If you cohabitate, it won´t be long before she might bring
up getting married or possibly having another child.
If your skin crawls, your stomach gets upset, and you feel like a
headache is coming on, know that you aren´t ready for what is
ahead. Slow down, learn more about the young lady before embracing
the kids, the family pet, and all that comes with them.
Living with a young woman with children isn´t easy. She has
two sides to her personality, the woman she is when she is with you
and the mother she is when she is with her children. Know how to separate
the two, and who knows, your relationship just might survive!
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